We usually have trouble with account applications at new Net banks. WSB was no exception. (See also, CompuBank OBR 10/98; and NextCard, OBR 5/98).

We’ve long been a proponent of the so-called instant credit application. It’s a powerful tool in a world accustomed to instant gratification. The downside of hyping your instant decision capability occurs when you can’t deliver on the promise. When we went to sign up for our initial account at WSB, we were impressed that they would give us instant approval on our account.

Of course, since we were only setting up a checking account, we thought the instant approval aspect was just a formality, so we were surprised to learn that our checking account application “requires offline processing” (screenshot above), and we would be notified of the decision within 30 days (full text below):

Requires Offline Processing:
We’re sorry, we are unable to offer an “instant” decision at this time. We have all the necessary information to process your application and you will be notified in writing regarding the status within 30 days, as required by law.

Please do not resubmit your application. Thank-you for applying!

In other words, “don’t call us, we’ll call you.” Is this any way to treat a new customer?

How about a little more info, like why it couldn’t be processed online, or that you’ll email us within 24 hours, or a link to customer service to inquire? And what about our $100 bonus you promised?

And who approved the “as required by law” copy? It makes us sound like a criminal for bothering the bank. Don’t you suppose WSB would respond to our application even if the law didn’t require them to do so? What a terrible first impression. Had we been a normal customer, we probably would have dismissed the bank at that point. The lesson here is twofold:

• Don’t overpromise: We don’t really care if we get instant “approval” when we sign up for a checking account. For most Net users, being approved for a checking account is nonsensical (what, you won’t take my money?), so don’t mention it. If you subsequently do provide an instant overdraft line of credit, then I will be happily surprised.
• Test all copy: It wouldn’t take 60 focus groups to identify this message as confusing and offensive. We can imagine the time pressure Bank One was under to launch WSB before its rivals, but fixing shoddy copy writing needn’t have delayed the launch.